Estimated reading time 7 minutes | Playlist Writing the Future by Veronica Agard of Ancestors in Training

The outcome of the recent election has been one of the latest exercises of dominant culture to create division and separation based on the exit polls and the information or misinformation they have shared. According to the exit polls by Edison Research, 85% of Black women voted for Kamala Harris and 13% of Black men voted for Donald Trump in this Presidential election. Right away, in various places across social media the anger (and I believe) the human need to understand, to logic, to make sense of the outcome of the election was to find ways to place blame. Whether it was because of the rhetoric of him being a felon or because of the ‘stimulus’ given while he was in office, many Black men felt it was perhaps in their best interest to vote the way they did. What does that mean for the rest of us? Do we just assume Black men hate Black women? That all Black men want Black women’s rights to be taken or for Black women to be knocked from our proverbial high-horse and be humbled through siding against collective values (a quick google search will surprise you on the Reddit threads and Quora shares). I’ve seen Black women, femmes and other siblings engaging in finger pointing, the blaming of the Latinx vote, white women and even Black men. Something not being discussed or pointed out is how limited statistics and numbers are and can be skewed (hence, my disdain for statistics). The first profile I've seen touch on this was @futureelderscollective, Elisia and @disruptforward.

Although they are pointing out the discrepancies in the polls and who conducts them, one thing I appreciate them offering is the invitation to inquire about the statistics and who is behind them. We know for the last several years there has been a digital battle against bots and misinformation programmed and added to our lives via interacting on social media platforms. There have been lawsuits and concerns around the ways algorithms and government influence can interact with social media platforms and the people, especially in regards to the freedom of speech. My question is this, if we as a community have always known to be distrustful of mainstream media and government when it reports on our communities (more often than not biased) why would we suddenly take this same media to tell us the truth about our community?

Rediscovering community in a Modern World

In the face of generational struggles and societal pressures, we find ourselves returning to the essence of community - and realizing that the answers, the support, and the healing we need has been within us all along. As the saying goes, “The call came from inside the house,” meaning that we already possess the knowledge, resilience and connection needed to nurture our communities and uplift each other BUT our healing and liberation will only come into fruition if we have reignited and rebuilt our communities in ways that serve the collective. This means it must be intergenerational and intersectional, bridging genders and gender fluid siblings, elders and youth, disabled and able-bodied family into the conversation of reclaiming and revitalizing community in a holistic way.

In my work as a decolonial healing guide, I witness daily the power that emerges when we turn inward - not just to ourselves but to our immediate families, friends and community circles. This “turning inward” means recognizing that, despite the societal barriers, we have the power and potential to be the source of our own healing. With a foundation in ancestral practices, community building becomes not just a choice but a deeply rooted call. We also cannot only turn to our communities for building without acknowledging the ways (whether presently or in the past) we have adopted colonial ways of being and thought while allowing harm to occur within our communities and go unaddressed. Too many of us grew up on, “what goes on in this house, stays in this house,” and yes, there are ways we as a culture have decided to not tell our business out of protection of ourselves (think of the ways children are taken from single- parent homes due to reports of neglect) and this is not the same as the ‘no snitching’ street code within our culture of not speaking of the violence and abuse happening within our homes and communities.

Our ancestors relied on each other in ways that transcended individualism, embracing community not only as a source of survival but as a path to joy, growth and identity. The essence of those practices – caring for one another, sharing resources, leaning on the wisdom of elders, and respecting the energy of the youth – still exists within us. My mission is to reawaken these ancestral ways in the name of collective strength, healing and liberation.

Why Intergenerational Connections Matter

We often overlook the importance of intergenerational connections, yet they are crucial for building a resilient, empowered community. Elders have walked the paths of survival, resilience and cultural knowledge, while the younger generation brings fresh perspectives, dreams and visions for the future. When these two forces unite, we create an unbreakable lineage.

For the men in our community, particularly, intergenerational dialogue can serve as a reminder of strength beyond physical power – a deep spiritual fortitude rooted in knowing one’s history. There is also the acknowledgement of the ways Black men have had to navigate and heal from the systems that seek to keep us oppressed and the reminder that even still, Black women have been the backbone for our communities regardless of what display of oppression dominant culture tried. For women, this connection offers a reclaiming of narratives that society has often distorted from sisterhood, to the needed support and guidance of elder women that have ‘been there, done that.’ When younger women hear directly from grandmothers and aunties about having navigating challenges, it empowers them to walk confidently in their truth and power as women, not their hurt or trauma.

My husband, RJ sitting with my Granduncle Bo and his wife in their living room in Charlotte, NC.

Building Community Through Healing Circles and Shared Practices

One of the ways I facilitate this intergenerational bonding is through healing circles and retreats, where we come together to explore our shared heritage and confront the individual and collective trauma we carry. These spaces allow men and women, young and old, to listen to one another’s experiences and insights, fostering a profound empathy and unity that many of us rarely find in everyday life.

In these gatherings, we engage in practices that honor our roots – from yoga and meditation to storytelling and ritual. We sit side by side and learn the power of holistic healing, reaching far beyond dominant culture’s way of separating mind from body, or the individual from the community. We learn that healing isn’t a solo journey but a communal act, with each person adding to the collective strength.

Nurturing the Next Generation

Young people need community more than ever, yet they often feel isolated, disconnected from their roots, and pressure to conform to societal expectations. We owe it to them – as elders, caregivers, and mentors – to pass down the wisdom, survival tools and traditions that sustain us. This doesn’t mean shielding them from the realities of the world but rather preparing them to face those realities with a sense of pride in their identity and purpose.

In this work, I emphasize teaching youth about the beauty of ancestral knowledge, the value of communal spaces, and the importance of self-awareness. For me it moves beyond teaching and speaking of the youth’s importance, it is embodied in the way my family homeschools and guides the young people in our home. They learn that community is not just about those in the room but about connecting to all those who came before us and all who will follow. This broader perspective equips them with a resilience that is often hard to cultivate in our disconnected world.

Answering the Call

When we say, “The call came from inside the house,” it’s a call to action, to bring our talents, traumas and pain, passions, skills and voices to our own communities rather than waiting for outside intervention. It’s a call to engage deeply, showing up for ourselves and each other. A call to acknowledge and address the ways we have been divided and caused harm to each other across lines of class, identity, gender and ability levels. As Black women and men, we hold the capacity for healing, strength, and transformation. This call urges us to acknowledge our shared history, embrace our collective power, and pour into one another to create a sustainable future.

The path ahead is not one we must walk alone; it’s a journey we travel together. Each generation has a role, each individual a unique gift, and together we weave a tapestry that embodies resilience, joy, and liberation. Let’s answer this call, knowing that the solutions we need are already within our reach, and let’s create a future where every generation feels seen, valued and inspired.

Join the Journey

If this resonates with you, I invite you to explore deeper with me – through healing retreats, gatherings, or simply connecting. We’re here to lift each other up, root to sky. Together, we can reclaim the strength of our ancestors and create spaces where we thrive, heal and evolve as one. The call is here. Are you ready to answer?

The call came from inside the house: awakening to community, ancestry and collective healing