Why I’m Trying to Leave Social Media
Hear me out, of course I watched The Social Dilemma and although it makes quite a compelling argument and affirms so much of what I have been feeling towards social media, I’m making as many attempts as I can to be off social media platforms and invite folks to be in created space offline.
I have had my share of endless scrolling, comparisons of myself to filters, and still going back to see how my words may or may not resonate with others. I am still human and although I may share how much I try to not really care about others opinions or perceptions of me, social media makes it hard not to.
The Taurean nature in me does not like to allow anything to be in control of me, besides well ME. My issue with social media is people forget how to interact with people offline in addition to feeling like because they witnessed someone share something on social media, they actually know the person or are entitled to that person’s life. Ewww. And yet, I too am guilty of feeling like I knew someone because things on their profile or in their stories resonated with me. Layer in social influencers and there is a whole other layer of confusion and concern (I will save that for another day).
I am such a private person. I mean super private and this has always been my nature. As a girl, I would try on clothes to show my mom and even cover my face while she determined whether my jeans fit or not. That is how private I am. I am also not interested in forcing a commitment to share something everyday if that is not what my heart feels like doing. I do not want to force BEing to be seen. I have experienced meeting someone in person whether out in a store or at an event and being shocked about them saying how long they have followed me on social media and love my kids or can’t wait for my chickens to lay their first eggs. I mean yes, I shared and put all of those things out there but I also feel super awkward because I feel like just another person no different than anyone else. I do not want anyone to idolize me or see me as a celebrity, its not me. I think this leads to people deciding to give their power away or be disempowered because they have raised someone or something up on a pedestal. In the words of the great Ancestor Ruby Sales, “Don’t do that to me. Do not idolize me because it limits the experience of who I am and flattens me to one idea. I am made of so much more.”
I am with Kanye. Before you write me off as crazy, hear me out. I would be pissed beyond measure if people were following me around in every aspect of my life and trying to capture photos of me and my family. I personally have no desire to #fangirl anyone because I imagine how exhausting that could be for a person. Could you imagine coming outside to get the mail and there are droves of people there waiting to write tabloids or stories about your morning breath or looking a hot mess?
I mean, I do not have droves of people outside of my home but for me, social media empowers people to feel like they are entitled to EVERY part of your humanity. I share a little bit more about this in one of my upcoming courses on managing the condition of expectations in dominant culture. I am very empathetic and have had to learn over time how to create firm boundaries for myself and one of those is acknowledging how much I enjoy my solitude and private home space. For me, this flows into social media. Life is sacred, each day is an opportunity to be intentional and some of those sacred moments invite us to be present with all that is in that moment instead of capturing the essence of the moment for the ‘gram.
How are you able to maintain your true self, without the use of social media?
How have you felt after taking a social media break?
